An old man and his wife have gone to bed.
After laying there a few minutes, the old man
farts and says:
"Seven points."

His wife rolls over and says:
"What in the world was that?"

The old man replied:
"It's fart football."

A few minutes later the wife lets one go and says:
"Touch down, tie score."

After five minutes the old man farts again and says:
"Touch down, I'm ahead 14 - 7."
Not to be outdone the wife rips another one and says:
"Touchdown, tie score."
Five seconds go by and she lets out a squeakier and
says; "Field goal, I lead 17 - 14."
Now the pressure is on and the old man refuses to get
beat by a woman so he strains real hard but to no avail.
Realizing a defeat is totally unacceptable he gives it everything
he has, but instead of farting he poops the bed.

The wife says ;
"What the hell was that?"
The old man replies ;
"Half-time, switch sides."