007oodiks
09-04-2002, 10:16 PM
just some funnies sent to me about boston(not from but I`am close to boston) *
*
Getting Around In Boston (for the "outlander") :
Pay no attention to the street names. There's no school on School Street, no court on Court Street, no dock on Dock Square, no water on Water Street.
Back Bay streets are in alphabetical odda: *Arlington, Berkeley, Clarendon, Dartmouth.
So are South Boston streets: A, B, C, D.
If the streets are named after trees (e.g. Walnut, Chestnut, Cedar), you're on Beacon Hill.
If they're named after poets, you're in Wellesley.
Southie is South Boston. The South End is the South End. * Eastie is East Boston. The North End is east of the West End. The West End and Scollay Square are no more, a guy named Rappaport got rid of them one night.
Massachusetts Definitions:
Frappes have ice cream, milkshakes don't.
If it is fizzy and flavored, it's tonic.
Soda is CLUB SODA. Pop is Dad.
When we mean Tonic WATER, we will ask for Tonic WATER.
The smallest beer is a pint.
Scrod is whatever they tell you it is, usually fish.
If you paid more than $6/pound, you got scrod.
It's not a water fountain; it's a bubblah.
It's not a trash can; it's a barrel.
It's not a shopping cart; it's a carriage.
It's not a purse; it's a pockabook.
They're not franks; they're haht dahgs.
Franks are money in France.
Things NOT to do in and around Boston:
Don't pahk your cah in Hahvid Yahd .. they'll tow it to Meffa (Medford) or Slumaville (Somerville).
Don't sleep in the Common.
Don't wear Orange in Southie on St. Patrick's Day
Things you should know:
There are two State Houses, two City Halls, two courthouses, two Hancock buildings (one old, one new).
Route 128 is also I-95. It's also I-93 for a stretch of time.
The underground train is not a subway. It's the "T" and it doesn't run all night (fah chrysakes, this ain't NooYawk!http://www.snowmobileworld-s2.com/forums/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/wink.gif
You know you're a Bostonian when:
You think that it's your God-given right to cut someone off in traffic and to 'J' walk.
You think that there are only 25 letters in the alphabet (no R's).
You think that three straight days of 90 degree temperatures is a heat wave.
You refer to six inches of snow as a "dusting."
You always "bang a left" as soon as the light turns green, and oncoming traffic always expects it.
Everything in town is "a five-minute walk."
You believe that using your turn signal is a sign of weakness.
You think that 63-degree ocean water is warm.
You think that the Kennedys are misunderstood.
*
Getting Around In Boston (for the "outlander") :
Pay no attention to the street names. There's no school on School Street, no court on Court Street, no dock on Dock Square, no water on Water Street.
Back Bay streets are in alphabetical odda: *Arlington, Berkeley, Clarendon, Dartmouth.
So are South Boston streets: A, B, C, D.
If the streets are named after trees (e.g. Walnut, Chestnut, Cedar), you're on Beacon Hill.
If they're named after poets, you're in Wellesley.
Southie is South Boston. The South End is the South End. * Eastie is East Boston. The North End is east of the West End. The West End and Scollay Square are no more, a guy named Rappaport got rid of them one night.
Massachusetts Definitions:
Frappes have ice cream, milkshakes don't.
If it is fizzy and flavored, it's tonic.
Soda is CLUB SODA. Pop is Dad.
When we mean Tonic WATER, we will ask for Tonic WATER.
The smallest beer is a pint.
Scrod is whatever they tell you it is, usually fish.
If you paid more than $6/pound, you got scrod.
It's not a water fountain; it's a bubblah.
It's not a trash can; it's a barrel.
It's not a shopping cart; it's a carriage.
It's not a purse; it's a pockabook.
They're not franks; they're haht dahgs.
Franks are money in France.
Things NOT to do in and around Boston:
Don't pahk your cah in Hahvid Yahd .. they'll tow it to Meffa (Medford) or Slumaville (Somerville).
Don't sleep in the Common.
Don't wear Orange in Southie on St. Patrick's Day
Things you should know:
There are two State Houses, two City Halls, two courthouses, two Hancock buildings (one old, one new).
Route 128 is also I-95. It's also I-93 for a stretch of time.
The underground train is not a subway. It's the "T" and it doesn't run all night (fah chrysakes, this ain't NooYawk!http://www.snowmobileworld-s2.com/forums/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/wink.gif
You know you're a Bostonian when:
You think that it's your God-given right to cut someone off in traffic and to 'J' walk.
You think that there are only 25 letters in the alphabet (no R's).
You think that three straight days of 90 degree temperatures is a heat wave.
You refer to six inches of snow as a "dusting."
You always "bang a left" as soon as the light turns green, and oncoming traffic always expects it.
Everything in town is "a five-minute walk."
You believe that using your turn signal is a sign of weakness.
You think that 63-degree ocean water is warm.
You think that the Kennedys are misunderstood.