The Degrees Of Blond-ness...

[cooley]

The Degrees of Blond-ness...

>

>

>1st DEGREE:

>A married couple were asleep when the phone rang at 2:00 AM. The blonde wife

>picks up the phone, listens a moment and shouts, "How should I know, that's

>200

>miles from here!" and hangs up.

>Her husband asks, "Who was that?"

>She replies, "I don't know, some woman wanting to know if the coast is

>clear."

>

>

>````````````````````````````````````````````````` ``````````

>2nd DEGREE:

>Two Blondes are walking down the street. One notices a compact on the

>sidewalk

>and leans down to pick it up. She opens it, looks in the mirror and says,

>"Hmmm,

>this person looks familiar."

>The second Blonde says, "Here, let me see!" So the first Blonde hands her the

>

>compact. She looks in the mirror and says, "You dummy it's me!"

>

>

>````````````````````````````````````````````````` ``````````

>3rd DEGREE:

>A young blonde woman is distraught because she fears her husband is having an

>

>affair, so she goes out and buys gun. The next day she comes home

>unexpectedly

>and finds her husband in bed with a beautiful redhead. The blonde is enraged

>and

>opens her purse to get the gun.

>Overcome with grief, she takes the gun out and puts it to her head.

>Her husband jumps out of bed, begging and pleading with her not to shoot

>herself.

>Hysterically the blonde responds to her husband, "Shut up...you're next!"

>

>

>````````````````````````````````````````````````` ``````````

>4th DEGREE:

>A blonde was bragging about her knowledge of state capitals. She proudly

>says,

>"Go ahead, ask me, I know all of them."

>A friend says, "O.K., what's the capital of Wisconsin?"

>The blonde replies, 'Oh, that's easy, W."

>

>

>````````````````````````````````````````````````` ``````````

>5th DEGREE:

>What did the blonde ask her doctor when he told her she was pregnant?

>"Are you sure it's mine?"

>

>

>````````````````````````````````````````````````` ``````````

>6th DEGREE:

>A blonde had just totaled her car in a devastating accident. Miraculously,

>she

>managed to pry herself from the wreckage without a scratch and was applying

>fresh lipstick when the state trooper arrived.

>"My God!" the trooper gasped, "Your car looks like an accordion that was

>stomped

>on by an elephant. Are you OK ma'am?"

>"Yes officer, I'm just fine!" the blonde chirped.

>"Well, how in the world did this happen?" the officer asked as he surveyed

>the

>wrecked car.

>"Officer, it was the strangest thing!" the blonde began. "I was driving along

>

>this road when from out of nowhere this TREE pops up in front of me. So I

>swerved to the right, and there was another tree! I swerved to the

>left and there was ANOTHER tree! I swerved to the right and there was another

>

>tree! I swerved to the left and there was..."

>"Uh, ma'am", the officer said, cutting her off. "There isn't a tree on this

>road

>for 30 miles. That was your air freshener swinging back and forth".

>

>

>````````````````````````````````````````````````` ``````````>

>7th DEGREE:

>A blonde returned home from work and was shocked to find her house ransacked

>and

>burglarized. She called the police immediately to report the crime. The

>police

>dispatcher broadcast the call on the channels and a K-9

>unit patrolling nearby was the first to respond.

>As the K-9 officer approached the house with his dog on a leash, the blonde

>ran

>out onto the porch. The sight of the cop and his dog made her shudder. She

>sat

>down on the steps and put her face and began moaning.

>"What's the moaning all about, ma'am?" asked the officer.

>The blonde replied, "I come home to find all my possessions stolen, so I call

>

>the police for help, and what do they do? They send me a blind policeman!"

[TripleDigits]

LOL i like the last one hahaha

[vapourtrail]

the last one,ha,ha,lol

The best one IMO is the 2nd Degree. LOL they are all hilarious!!